They tell me that they are interested in learning more about where they have gone wrong in the past couple elections and how they can get back on track. So far, so sensible. Here's how the phrase the question:
1. Why did Republicans lose the White House and Congressional seats in the 2008 elections? Check all that apply.
Government's Response to Katrina
Republicans acted like Democrats
President Bush's policies
Oh, don't get too stressed about it, guys - I'm sure it was just the liberal media.
2. What are the key strengths and beliefs of the Republican Party that we can build on? Check all that apply.
Forget that this party isn't exactly noteworthy for it's ethical integrity of late, or that I think their claim to personal responsibility and fiscal discipline is... dubious to say the least. I think it's the Pro-Life thing I would go with - after all, nothing says "restored electoral majority" like a position that 63% of Americans oppose.
But it GETS EVEN BETTER! Then they go on to ask us about a whole bunch of issues and our views on them.
Here's the very first question they ask:
1. A recent national poll reported that nearly 25% of Americans want the government to pass more socialism. Do you agree or disagree?
Hmmm... gee, I don't know? How socialist do I want to be? Is Che Guevera Socialist enough, or should I be shooting higher?
Check out this double whammy:
5. Should Republicans unite to block new federal government bureaucracy and red tape that will crush future economic growth?
6. Should Republicans in Congress oppose the new wasteful government spending programs passed in the recent "stimulus" bill by the Pelosi-Reid Democrats designed to "spread the wealth"?
Gotta love the scare quotes.
8. Should we do everything we can to block Democrats who are trying to shut down conservative talk radio with the so-called "fairness doctrine"?
NO ONE is trying to do this. It's not on our agenda. I promise you, we evil liberals are not organising to... Oh never mind, what's the point?
9. Should we resist Barack Obama's proposal to spend billions of federal taxpayer dollars to pay "volunteers" who perform his chosen tasks?
I actually have no idea what this is referring to. Some sort of dig at ACORN? Just stumped on this one - anyone else have an idea?
The foreign policy section goes to a whole new level of "Huh?" - I won't copy the whole thing in cause I'd be here all day, but check out this one:
8. Even though Barack Obama pledged to meet personally with the likes of Raul Castro, Hugo Chavez and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, should Republicans continue to focus on supporting democratic movements in oppressive states like Cuba, Venezuela and Iran?
No. Personally, I think we should oppose Democratic reform because I hear Raul Castro serves good rum at HIS meetings.
Alert: Please note presence of Sarcasm in above comment.